Two Birthdays

 April 16th – this day holds deep grief and great joy together.

I have 2 birthdays to celebrate today… Matt's birth into heaven, and Monty’s birthday here on earth. Please don’t throw rocks at me for comparing these 2 events, I’m aware that one was my dear husband of 25 years and the other just a puppy. But, they are related in my world...

Matt entered into eternal joy and delight on this day 2 years ago. It was the hardest moment I’ve ever endured. I want so often to show or tell him something one of the kids has done or said, or to ask his wise advice. He would be so proud of them and how they are growing, both physically and spiritually. They were his pride and joy, and he was an amazing husband and dad! We all miss him terribly.

Monty entered this world 1 year ago, on the very date that Matt went to heaven a year earlier. Misha (Matt’s other pride and joy – his beloved golden retriever) left us early into the spring COVID shutdown. It was brutal to say goodbye to her, it felt like losing a little more of Matt. I did NOT want another dog! I was convinced no other dog could ever measure up, and I certainly didn’t want to risk letting my heart break again (not to mention the agony of puppyhood!)

But, Don & Noah had devised other plans and plotted a puppy coup. The twists and turns of that adventure brought a little golden miracle into my heart, one that had been born on April 16th of all dates.

Yet, I can’t help but think that God planned those dates to overlap just to make a point I couldn’t miss. Monty has brought our family so much JOY! He is a great friend and a fun companion to walk and romp with. His favorite activity is called “Let’s wake up the kids” where he gleefully runs into each room and licks each face awake. His energy is contagious and he is FULL of life! He didn’t replace Misha, he’s entirely his very own dog. He didn’t make us miss Misha less, he came and made his own space in our hearts.

I know Matt wanted us to LIVE – to be fully, thankfully alive. Embracing the miracle of Monty has been something I’m sure would have made him proud (and given him something to tease me endlessly with… I’m a DOG person?!)

Happy Heaven Birthday Matt – we’ll keep on doing our best to choose life and joy here until we all join you there!

Happy Birthday Monty – thank you for showing us what life and joy looks like!