20 Years Later...

20 Years Later… 

We are starting school today… yes, it’s a late start for most homeschoolers. I’m sipping my coffee and reflecting over the past 20 years of homeschooling my eight children as I let my sleepy teenagers wake up a bit slower (minus the alarm clock.)


This journey has definitely been the most easy, most difficult, most thrilling, most depressing, and the most unexpectedly beautiful adventure! What an invitation from God, I’m so glad I accepted it. And all along the journey I have been privileged to have gotten a front-row window seat.


In my early 20’s I wasn’t on the path to motherhood and homeschooling certainly was the furthest thing from my mind. My “career” was my plan. But then God gave me the “desires of my heart” before I even realized what they were! Homeschooling my children came into focus and became a reality.


We started out with nothing more than a sweet, eager-faced little towhead boy. With his newly sharpened pencil, he eagerly waited for me at a re-purposed, hand-me-down end table with a little stool in our unfinished basement and a handful of books. While we read and played together, I discovered a great and unexpected pleasure in teaching this little person whom I loved most in the whole world. I jumped wholeheartedly into the joy of teaching him and vowed I’d never share that joy with some unknown schoolteacher down the street.


As we ventured along this path, our family kept adding a new student every couple of years. One of my first big homeschool purchases was my “school table” – a real, school-quality, blue table with adjustable legs that we could raise and lower. I got quite a workout over the years doing deep squats near that table every day! I vividly remember sitting at that very table with my older three children and thinking, “Someday… all these chairs will be filled with my kiddos, and God wants ME to teach all of them!” It was hugely intimidating yet quite exciting, too!


We outgrew the table pretty quickly. I knew I was in over my head and would need divine intervention to complete this monumental task! I asked God to show up and help me do this…since it had been His idea from the beginning! I kept that table for many years, it was always a symbol of God’s provision for me: He called me to this job, and He showed up day after day to help me.


Our journey took us through several family moves to several different states. We participated in co-ops and didn’t participate in co-ops. We played sports, did music lessons and orchestras, joined theater groups, and drove to hundreds of soccer practices and ballet lessons–and didn’t do all that, too. We had seasons with church activities and programs and seasons without.


We prioritized the Word of God. We memorized scripture (thank you - Awana and the Bible Bee!) We read about our heroes with biographies about Christian missionaries from all over the globe. (My second big purchase was every YWAM Benge Christian Heroes Then & Now series ever printed!) We LOVED reading them out loud as a family and listening to them on road trips. They built an incredible shared heritage between the kids and us and gave all of us a passion for the world and godly heroes to look up to. We prayed over countries and Unreached People Groups. We studied worldview and apologetics together and learned about the world God so loves.


We spent endless hours lost in great books and read-alouds together –The Wingfeather Saga and the Mysterious Benedict Society series were a few favorites. Our family has many hysterical inside jokes that come from the pages of the books we shared together. Almost all my favorite homeschool memories contain references to the books we read.


We explored the wonders of science together. We watched as tadpoles turned into frogs (that lived for 7 YEARS!) We marveled at our caterpillars flying away as butterflies. We collected every type of stick, pinecone, stone and bird nest we could find! We took countless nature center and science museum field trips and practically grew up at the zoo. We did experiments (including my personal favorite…the dissections!) together at the kitchen table and in classes at coop together with our friends.


We learned about the world while we cooked the craziest concoctions, (ever tried Pilgrim Swill?) and eagerly tasted food from all over the world (Vegemite anyone?). Our home was filled with maps and globes. For many years we had maps on the kitchen table under clear tablecloths. Our favorite school time snacks came from our “Universal Yums” boxes as we tried treats from different countries.


We ventured into high school, eager to prove we had done this homeschooling thing well. We mastered dual credit college courses, and rigorous study, classic literature analysis papers and the ACT. We did all the “Bonus” questions, and extra credit assignments and we had years we didn’t even finish the book!


I discovered I had a passion for teaching– both at home, and in a co-op setting. We learned to manage our time (the kids and me!) by doing schoolwork, having part-time jobs and balancing our commitments and responsibilities. We survived Driver’s Ed (Only a few more to go…) We deepened our faith and understanding by taking the Perspectives of the World Christian Movement course together. We went on mission trips and learned to serve others. And we learned to bravely step off the fast track and customize their education to the person God created them to be with new and varied learning opportunities.


We experienced health issues and came face-to-face with cancer, twice. We suffered deep tragedy and we wrestled with trusting in the goodness of God. We learned how truly faithful God is. We experienced beauty for ashes and thrilling new beginnings.


We came to the end of the school years for my first born (that seemed would never end) and I had the great joy to hand my son a high school diploma. I was an absolute emotional mess as I graduated Sam, my always eager student, in a full cap & gown ceremony with all the pomp and circumstance (How do we parents ever survive the Senior slide show?)


More years passed and more graduations have taken place. I’ve loved seeing each of them fly high beyond our homeschool! So much is happening now with all of them and some are launching into adulting from home which has had some amazing lessons, blessings and opportunities for all of us! My kiddos joke that I get more relaxed with each child… the last one will probably have a diploma thrown out the window at them as I speed off in my much-dreamed-about red convertible… and a laugh…a wild crazy laugh!) Homeschooling will make you lose your mind at times!


These past 20 years have taught me so much more than I ever dreamed. Sometimes I believe God’s direction to homeschool my children may have actually been more about my learning than theirs. There are amazing and abundant blessings that came with this decision! I have learned that I need to be constantly reliant on the Lord for each and every step along this path. Each new season requires His fresh guidance for the twists and turns ahead that only He knows are necessary for the wonders He wants to bring. I need to be truly as dependent on His leading today as I was in that first uncertain day.


This gift of TIME with my children is the most precious gift I’ve ever been given. I had time to get to know them, time experience life with them, time to learn together, time to grow in knowing God together, time to get to know and love on many people together and time to catch a glimpse of the amazing people God designed them to be.

I was given an invitation to participate in this great work to the very end of the journey–their graduation from High School and beyond! I’m so incredibly grateful! I pray that you will accept the invitation too!

Blessings,

Renita 

All your children will be taught by the Lord, and great will be their peace. - Isaiah 54:13

Two Trains

 TWO TRAINS

Where are you Going?

I’m probably going to be unpopular stating this opinion, but I have learned it from personal experience, so hear me out…

Maybe you do NOT need to do AP, Honors, or dual credit college courses while in high school. Whew… I said it, after graduating five students from our homeschool (they were all homeschooled K-12 and all earned college credits on their transcripts).

Close your eyes and imagine with me that you are getting on a train. You purchase your ticket and sit down to enjoy the scenery. BUT you forgot to check the train’s destination.

You wanted the “Scenic Train of Wisdom” that took the beautiful route–the one including stunning views and a delightful table set before you, complete with tea and scones as you gazed out the windows. You wanted to marvel at the company, enjoy the conversations, and simply soak it all in.

Instead, you accidentally purchased a seat on the “High-Speed Bullet Train of Knowledge”. You sat down, buckled up and took off. There’s no chance to see the sights as they whiz by, no time for a restful meal, no deep conversations. It’s just zoom to the destination in the most efficient and speedy way on the pre-determined train schedule.

This is what dual credit in high school was like for us. Sure, we were able to earn college credit in an efficient way and my children were certainly capable of doing the course work. But I should have remembered something I always say… “Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.” I forgot to check which train we took a seat on and the destination this ticket would take us to.

The “High-Speed Bullet Train of Knowledge” got them to college quicker, for sure. But we missed the scenery! We didn’t have time to taste the tea or enjoy the conversations on the ever-faster speeding pace. They earned college credit and stuck to the pre-determined schedule (which dictated our family schedule as well). My children finished their degrees and got off the faster train only to discover that they really didn’t know where they were. They arrived at the destination early but, they missed a whole lot along the journey that cannot be revisited. They were in the rush to get to that “somewhere” they couldn’t quite define. They had empty suitcases without the souvenirs and treasures they should have collected along the way. They had their college degrees in hand, yes, but they lacked much of the real-life wisdom and experiences that they could have had.

The slower “Scenic Train of Wisdom” takes a more enjoyable route. This train’s schedule allows for multiple stops along the way and offers the time needed to experience and engage in the opportunities that present themselves. You are even allowed to stop this train and get off to explore without disrupting the ever-demanding schedule. There is an open invitation to take side journeys like mission trips, back-yard building projects, and serving opportunities in all shapes and sizes. Not only that, but you can also collect precious souvenirs along the way–souvenirs like valuable lessons and skills learned while serving others and the real life experiences that will help put knowledge into practice, along with the abundant blessing of time to develop an ever-deepening understanding of who God is.

This has really gotten me thinking about these two trains. I know it’s very popular to grab a ticket on the “High-Speed Bullet Train of Knowledge” and get a head start on college, but, maybe what our children will miss out on isn’t worth the price of admission.

HIGH SCHOOL YEARS ARE THE BEST TIME TO HOMESCHOOL! The four short High School years are full of scenery we don’t want to miss. We finally get to relax from some of the pressure of teaching those labor-intensive basics and get to sit back to taste the depths of what our children know. We get to share real-life experiences together–without car seats, strollers and diaper bags! We get to enjoy deep conversations (usually late at night) as we get to really know WHO they are becoming while we listen to their hearts. These years are truly filled with WONDER! The “Scenic Train of Wisdom” has treasures we should consider carefully before we trade them for a couple more college credits.

The slower “Scenic Train of Wisdom” also gives our children a chance to look around and explore where they really want to go. High school is such a short season, and it can never be replaced. This is the final opportunity to truly taste all the options available and to see which they prefer before getting stuck on the fast track to college which can actually limit their choices long-term. College, on the other hand, doesn’t have a “use-by” date, it can be done any time for the rest of their lives.

I'm praying that before you hop on the homeschool train of high school (and you certainly will want to!) spend some time considering where the destination is heading to before you grab your seat!

Blessings,

Renita

“This is what the LORD says: “Stop at the crossroads and look around. Ask for the old, godly way, and walk in it. Travel its path, and you will find rest for your souls. But you reply, ‘No, that’s not the road we want!” – Jeremiah 6:16

My Homeschool Alarm Clock

 It’s the time of the summer my thoughts start to turn toward our upcoming year.  I’ve finally given up all the guilt from things we didn’t finish and let go of the grand plans I made this time last year!   I’ve slept in, drank my coffee peacefully and completely unwound from the past school year.  Now, my internal homeschool alarm clock has started to ring to remind me to start looking ahead to our next year… or not?

 

I’m going into my 20th year of homeschooling (yep… with 5 more years to go) I feel like I’m having an “awakening” on our homeschool path.  I know, I should have this down already, right? I’ve graduated half of my students - all with near perfect GPA’s, beautifully curated transcripts, and even hefty college scholarships. Yet…I’m feeling the nudges from the Lord that a new and different plan is waiting for me around the bend. Strange, I know.

 

But these 20 years have taught me to listen to that “still small voice” and to follow where HIS path leads instead of my own understanding. So, instead of my usual attempts to get a running start to “planning season” for our homeschool year, I’m lingering in my summer-relaxed mode for at least a few more weeks.

 

Maybe some of you need a “thumbs up” to linger awhile longer as well.  It’s OKAY, maybe even BENEFICIAL to take a pause from the curriculum search and spend some time sipping coffee on your porch swing (or hammock) with a book you’ve been “saving” for a time when you have some time (Please - I can’t be the only one that does this!). Maybe you need another unscheduled day at home, or an impromptu hike or maybe even a swim (ocean, lake, river… even just the kiddie pool!)  Maybe the closest thing to school or planning you need is a few more chapters of your read aloud (remember… the one you didn’t finish) on the trampoline or the grassy spot under the tree at the local park?

 

I’m not sure why I feel the compulsion to SLOW down this summer.  Maybe it’s the realization of how few summers we really have in this season of parenting.  These summer days are limited editions, they don’t last forever, and they are impossible to replace!  I do know I want to savor them… not rush on to the next thing.

 

So mommas, here is your permission slip to hit snooze on that homeschool alarm clock!  Take some time to savor these final weeks of summer guilt-free with the amazing crew the Lord has gifted you with.  I dare you to jump in the water with your kids, eat the ice cream cones together, and wait to worry about the upcoming year.  The Lord has already gone before you, and he will show you the way you should go… at the proper time.

 

Blessings,

Renita

Rebels Unite!

 

Rebels Unite!

I saw this meme with this comment “Join the insurgency of the beautiful, good, and true.” I loved it! I’ve always been a bit of a rebel, but little did I know that is exactly what God wanted for me all along.  (Sorry Mom & Dad…) Insurgency can be defined as “an active revolt or uprising.” Sounds exactly like what we need today. Let’s start this insurgency of beauty, goodness and truth, and let the revolution begin in our homes and homeschools! How can we bring this uprising to life?  Here’s a couple of thoughts… Find the beautiful.  We need beauty, it’s transformative. Have you shown your children how to seek out and appreciate beauty?  It’s literally all around us, all the time.  We just need open eyes to see.  This requires intentional pauses (yes, that means we need to slow down!).  I challenge you to look around you right now… name something beautiful you see.  Is it outside in nature? Is it in the way light moves through your windows? Is it your favorite soft blanket, or coffee cup?  Tell your children what you find beautiful, show them.  I can almost guarantee - if you think it’s beautiful, they will too. Bring goodness.   Goodness has synonyms like “kindness, generosity or beneficial”. What could happen if a wave of kindness started spreading out from our homes?  It could change the world! Simple acts of kindness can completely change your day, and may I remind you… your children are watching and learning from you. When is the last time you smiled at a clerk and genuinely asked them how their day was going? Or let someone go ahead of you in the long check-out lane? Once again, opportunities are all around us if we a simply aware.  How about radical acts of generosity in the face of rising prices, inflation and shortages?  How could you share what you have and multiply your blessing?  It can be as simple as a batch of cookies shared with a neighbor (by the way, do you know their names?), or it could be much larger like sharing your time and resources with another struggling family. Could this infusion of goodness be beneficial to us? You betcha! (opps… my Minnesotan is showing again.) Prioritize the focus on the TRUTH in your daily life and in your homeschool lessons.  Have we helped our children recognize what is true from what is “almost true”? Our society has become inundated with lies, do we recognize them? This is where a constant study of the Bible and Apologetics will serve your family well and give them solid ground to take a stand on.  Don’t be tempted to assume that you have “covered” it before and that means that they have learned it. (Or that a weekly visit to church will be enough.)  We need a full immersion in truth! Keep repeating Bible and Apologetics lessons, every year, until you see the fruit of it in your life and your student’s lives.  We need daily inoculations of beauty, goodness and truth in our homes and homeschools and we must train our families to fearlessly pursue them! “I am doing a great work. I can't come down…” Nehemiah 6:3 Blessings, Renita

Lessons from the Campsite

 I can’t believe it took me so long to take the leap of faith and load up the family for a trek to the mountains to go CAMPING!

I know many of you are already “campers” and loving it, but to those of you that have been hesitating - I’m encouraging you to just do it!

The homeschooling lessons are abundant (and some of them worthy of the transcript ).  Here’s a few we picked up on this inaugural tent trip:

1.  We really need peace and quiet!  Yes, we did take 6 kids with us, ages 13-21, and yes, they are loud.  But one thing we all agreed on… the quietness from the daily bustle of electronics and media was soul-refreshing and much needed.  When is the last time you intentionally unplugged?  You don’t have to sleep in a tent to do it (although it helps). 

Homeschool Tip: Set a goal to make space for some quietness.

2.  We don’t need all the gear!  We were blessed to have the basics - tents, sleeping bags (lots and lots of sleeping bags), camp stove, and cooler.  After we got unpacked, I began to notice the other campsites around us with all the “cool” camping gear like outdoor “privacy tents”, flashy hammocks, and outdoor showers with hot water, etc., etc., etc.  The lesson here is - you don’t need everything to have a successful camping (or homeschooling) experience!  In fact, the basics served us quite well and even comfortably. 

Homeschool Tip: Stop looking at your neighbor’s campsite…or homeschool and enjoy your own.

3. What you forget doesn’t matter, it’s what you remember!  After fretting about all the details and packing everything I could imagine we would need… we inevitably forgot things.  There were “gaps” in our camping supplies.  They slept in 30 to 40 degree temperatures with nothing but sleeping bags between them and the cold, hard ground (we didn’t bring air mattresses).  They created entertainment for themselves (we didn’t have electricity) they walked, and ran, and swam and really engaged in the world around them.  They even survived several days without a shower!  My point is that your homeschool may have some “gaps” but, that doesn’t mean it’s not a success. What we forgot did NOT remotely diminish our experience and the memories we made. 

Homeschool Tip: Focus on what you have, not what you don’t.

After our memorable week camping, everyone agrees it was the best experience ever, and we are all looking forward to our next adventure!

Blessings,

Renita

Lessons from the Succulents

Recently, we discovered a hidden treasure in our own hometown. A succulent nursery filled with row after row of beautiful and unique succulents.

We were enthralled by each new tray of these intricate and varied plants, gleefully exclaiming over the colors and shapes, and delighting with each new plant we added them to our purchase wagon (yes…we needed a wagon!)

It got me thinking, “Do we marvel at the variety and uniqueness of each of these succulents, yet don’t recognize the variety and uniqueness of each of our children?” Stay with me here…it applies to your homeschool journey.

We start this homeschooling path with bright eyes and eager hearts, determined to grow our children in a well-tended greenhouse with a unique, customized education that will give them a “love of learning” for their lifetime. But all too often, we fall prey to the elements; the pressures, the comparisons, the lies, the fears and instead we can create a learning environment that looks far too similar to those in the local “garden center”.

Succulents are well designed to withstand the elements. They need very little to survive and even thrive; they are very hardy little plants. If you overwater succulents, they will die. If you underwater other types of plants, their leaves yellow, wilt and fall off. Different plants require different care. Our children’s education is much the same. They do not all require the same schedule, the same classes, the same path to graduation, or the same skills beyond. Who determines if how to diagram a sentence or how to hammer a nail is more important? How about learning Latin or mastering video editing? Should they study the principles of physics or the practices of entrepreneurship? Who determines if a 4-day school week or a 5-day schedule is better? YOU do. You are the keeper of this garden!

Each of my children has unique and different educational needs, so a one-size-fits-all education would never serve them. Some of them thrive with a schedule and a carefully organized plan – both for the day ahead and for their future. They complete every assignment diligently and tackle academic classes and college degrees with focus and determination.

Others are a bit more free-spirited and often prefer days spent exploring and experiencing the elements, rather than constant carefully crafted schedules. They look at life from different angles and see opportunities others may miss. They need time to use their hands and minds to create new things and purse innovative ideas. They seek out challenges with courage and excitement.

Each of these tender plants need my careful attention to continue to grow. This is how the gardener’s job works; you must customize the care to fit the needs of the plant. So why would we insist that our unique and varied children follow the same specific pattern for growth and learning?


These beautiful children are planted in your garden by the God who intentionally created them. He’s given you the honor of tending them as they grow. I encourage you to really study them, see their variety and uniqueness, and customize your “gardening” techniques for them to best help them thrive in the unique ways God has for them.


Blessings,

Renita

Closing the Escape Hatch!

When our children began approaching high school, a new question quietly crept into my mind.

Is homeschooling high school really worth it?
Will I really be able to teach them everything they need to know?

After walking through these years myself, I can answer that question with confidence.

Yes. Absolutely yes.

When we first began homeschooling twenty plus years ago, I never imagined we would actually graduate our children. At the time it felt more like an experiment. We took it “one year at a time,” waiting to see how things would unfold.

But somewhere around sixth or seventh grade with my oldest, I heard a homeschool speaker say something that changed my thinking completely.

He said homeschool parents need to “close the escape hatch.”

Instead of treating homeschooling like a temporary experiment, he challenged parents to commit to the long-term vision all the way to graduation.

That moment shifted something in me.

I stopped thinking “one year at a time” and started picturing graduation day.

I am so thankful we did.

Today we have graduated seven of our eight children, and I wouldn’t change a thing. All went on to attend the colleges of their choosing with generous scholarships and pursue their dreams and ambitions. But surprisingly, that isn’t the main reason I’m grateful we stayed the course.

The real gift of homeschooling through high school is something much deeper.

By the time your children reach these years, you’ve already done the hardest work — the long days of teaching them to read, drilling multiplication tables, and navigating the confusing maze of English grammar. High school is our last chance with them. These four short years are the prime time to press in, and really help them know and understand the Bible, to study Apologetics together (the reasons to believe the Christian faith), practice Communication skills (like writing and speaking) and open their eyes to the wonder of Creation through Science all around them! It was tempting to fall prey to the fear of them missing out, my own insecurities, or the anxiety of comparison during these teen years. But I decided to  “close the escape hatch” and really go for it! 

Why quit just when school finally starts getting interesting?

But even more than the academics, something else happened during these years.

I got to see who they are becoming.

High schoolers can certainly be messy, loud, and occasionally careless — but they are also fascinating young adults filled with energy, creativity, and ideas about the future. Watching them grow into the people God designed them to be is one of the greatest privileges of these years. They are the businesspeople, doctors and nurses, craftspeople, and law makers for the next generation - and I have been given a gift of being the most powerful impact on them now! 

I often think about Esther from the Bible.

Her courage to stand before the king didn’t appear out of nowhere. It was built over years of quiet influence from her cousin Mordecai. I imagine long conversations, encouragement, and reminders of who she truly was in God’s eyes.

Those unseen years prepared her for the moment when everything mattered.

The same is true for my children.

These high school years are the final season I have to pour deeply into their hearts before they step out into the world on their own.

And something else happened during those years that I didn’t expect. While I thought I was preparing them for their future…

God was still shaping mine.

I was raising them.

And all along,

He was remaking me.

Blessings,

Renita