Lessons from the Succulents

Recently, we discovered a hidden treasure in our own hometown. A succulent nursery filled with row after row of beautiful and unique succulents.

We were enthralled by each new tray of these intricate and varied plants, gleefully exclaiming over the colors and shapes, and delighting with each new plant we added them to our purchase wagon (yes…we needed a wagon!)

It got me thinking, “Do we marvel at the variety and uniqueness of each of these succulents, yet don’t recognize the variety and uniqueness of each of our children?” Stay with me here…it applies to your homeschool journey.

We start this homeschooling path with bright eyes and eager hearts, determined to grow our children in a well-tended greenhouse with a unique, customized education that will give them a “love of learning” for their lifetime. But all too often, we fall prey to the elements; the pressures, the comparisons, the lies, the fears and instead we can create a learning environment that looks far too similar to those in the local “garden center”.

Succulents are well designed to withstand the elements. They need very little to survive and even thrive; they are very hardy little plants. If you overwater succulents, they will die. If you underwater other types of plants, their leaves yellow, wilt and fall off. Different plants require different care. Our children’s education is much the same. They do not all require the same schedule, the same classes, the same path to graduation, or the same skills beyond. Who determines if how to diagram a sentence or how to hammer a nail is more important? How about learning Latin or mastering video editing? Should they study the principles of physics or the practices of entrepreneurship? Who determines if a 4-day school week or a 5-day schedule is better? YOU do. You are the keeper of this garden!

Each of my children has unique and different educational needs, so a one-size-fits-all education would never serve them. Some of them thrive with a schedule and a carefully organized plan – both for the day ahead and for their future. They complete every assignment diligently and tackle academic classes and college degrees with focus and determination.

Others are a bit more free-spirited and often prefer days spent exploring and experiencing the elements, rather than constant carefully crafted schedules. They look at life from different angles and see opportunities others may miss. They need time to use their hands and minds to create new things and purse innovative ideas. They seek out challenges with courage and excitement.

Each of these tender plants need my careful attention to continue to grow. This is how the gardener’s job works; you must customize the care to fit the needs of the plant. So why would we insist that our unique and varied children follow the same specific pattern for growth and learning?


These beautiful children are planted in your garden by the God who intentionally created them. He’s given you the honor of tending them as they grow. I encourage you to really study them, see their variety and uniqueness, and customize your “gardening” techniques for them to best help them thrive in the unique ways God has for them.


Blessings,

Renita

Closing the Escape Hatch!

When our children began approaching high school, a new question quietly crept into my mind.

Is homeschooling high school really worth it?
Will I really be able to teach them everything they need to know?

After walking through these years myself, I can answer that question with confidence.

Yes. Absolutely yes.

When we first began homeschooling twenty plus years ago, I never imagined we would actually graduate our children. At the time it felt more like an experiment. We took it “one year at a time,” waiting to see how things would unfold.

But somewhere around sixth or seventh grade with my oldest, I heard a homeschool speaker say something that changed my thinking completely.

He said homeschool parents need to “close the escape hatch.”

Instead of treating homeschooling like a temporary experiment, he challenged parents to commit to the long-term vision all the way to graduation.

That moment shifted something in me.

I stopped thinking “one year at a time” and started picturing graduation day.

I am so thankful we did.

Today we have graduated seven of our eight children, and I wouldn’t change a thing. All went on to attend the colleges of their choosing with generous scholarships and pursue their dreams and ambitions. But surprisingly, that isn’t the main reason I’m grateful we stayed the course.

The real gift of homeschooling through high school is something much deeper.

By the time your children reach these years, you’ve already done the hardest work — the long days of teaching them to read, drilling multiplication tables, and navigating the confusing maze of English grammar. High school is our last chance with them. These four short years are the prime time to press in, and really help them know and understand the Bible, to study Apologetics together (the reasons to believe the Christian faith), practice Communication skills (like writing and speaking) and open their eyes to the wonder of Creation through Science all around them! It was tempting to fall prey to the fear of them missing out, my own insecurities, or the anxiety of comparison during these teen years. But I decided to  “close the escape hatch” and really go for it! 

Why quit just when school finally starts getting interesting?

But even more than the academics, something else happened during these years.

I got to see who they are becoming.

High schoolers can certainly be messy, loud, and occasionally careless — but they are also fascinating young adults filled with energy, creativity, and ideas about the future. Watching them grow into the people God designed them to be is one of the greatest privileges of these years. They are the businesspeople, doctors and nurses, craftspeople, and law makers for the next generation - and I have been given a gift of being the most powerful impact on them now! 

I often think about Esther from the Bible.

Her courage to stand before the king didn’t appear out of nowhere. It was built over years of quiet influence from her cousin Mordecai. I imagine long conversations, encouragement, and reminders of who she truly was in God’s eyes.

Those unseen years prepared her for the moment when everything mattered.

The same is true for my children.

These high school years are the final season I have to pour deeply into their hearts before they step out into the world on their own.

And something else happened during those years that I didn’t expect. While I thought I was preparing them for their future…

God was still shaping mine.

I was raising them.

And all along,

He was remaking me.

Blessings,

Renita